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//*Wednesday, May 21, 2008*//


HAI~ totally disappointed wif myself... for nt being responsible... tink i can go die la... as soon as possible... hw can i get rid of all the probs i hav... making myself and also my frens to be disappointed for wad i have created...

tml~ 22nd of may... abt one more wk to our CT. hav been nt gg for sch for so mani times... gettin rdy to fail liao rite ONG BI SHI? feeling sick n tired of being sick... wth is my body havin such probs everytime? tink is my metality makin myself sick... i cant continue lyk tt... but is it too late alreadi? i feel so lost...

anyways, he's gg in on 10th Jun... nt able to pass... being dependent on him too much i guess... im so sad n scared... i scared tt i cant carry on my life as normal when he's nt ard mi so the comin 2 yrs... im scared of loneliness... scared of havin to face all e probs myself... scared of losing him... tink i totally hav no confidence in myself... being a failure for so long... hw can i change my life...

tis sem. means a lot to mi... got to pass tis sem. in order to catch up the rest... in order nt to repeat another sem. in order to improve my life... etc etc... but i am nt doin enuff to make all tis come true... kept falling sick... duno wad has happened... i tink emotionally wise im always sick... hais... WTH!

i got to be brave... got to change... i got to do someting to prove myself... im feeling v.sorry to those who is always supporting mi... and also v.sorry to my fren who has been helpin me all along... i got to change...

ya... no more takin steps by steps... always giving excuses rite OBS... got to wake up le gal...



*my heart was broken_


8:20 PM